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Stepdaughter Communication: February 23, 2016

Posted by stuffilikenet in Brilliant words, Toys.
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Hey so I dropped and cracked my phone and now it’s automatically searching google for what autocorrected to "Jihad" and "Mmmmmmmm I can haz burger" and keeps trying to send random texts in gibberish to people and is also automatically ordering food from Sprig (I just had to call Lars from Sprig to cancel my order three times and the phone hung up on him twice and called some random number that it typed in itself) I mean, I don’t need THREE herb salads, iPhone. I don’t even want one!

So… I’m going to turn my poltergeisty phone off and use my iPad so if you have iMessage I should get it or you can contact me through FB messenger for a few days until I get my screen fixed and phone exorcized.

Currently it is on my coffee table and I keep looking over at it to make sure it’s still there and not terrorizing the neighborhood. I may have to stick it in a locked box in the closet tonight so I can sleep instead of having it slit my throat with its shattered glass only to possess my body. If I sound like Siri the next time you hear from me… Run.