Brought to its Logical Conclusion

Stolen from The List Which Cannot Be Named:

> Whenever stupid copyrights/patents like this come up, I’m reminded
> of a joke an old friend of mine used to tell, back in the Amazon
> one-click patent days:
>
> "I’m going to take out a patent on chewing food".
>
dibs on digestion!

But I think we all can make good guesses on who holds the patents for shitting, though it’s not clear to me who owns the shit, or what the shit transmission protocols and fees covering same would be. Comcast is the clear reference example/precedent holder there.

—

I’m pretty sure [favorite corporate whipping boy here] already holds
the patent on being an asshole.